Ways to Support Youth and Parents in Navigating Holiday Stress
As we close out 2024 and welcome the new year, take a moment to prioritize self-care in a way that best suits your personal needs.
While the holiday season is often called “the most wonderful time of the year,” it can also bring its fair share of stress and loneliness for many. Between the pressures of family, finances, and festive expectations, it's easy to feel overwhelmed. Reflect on the growth and challenges you experienced over the past year; every step forward, no matter how small, is worth celebrating. We hope this newsletter offers helpful tools and resources to support your mental wellbeing as you navigate the holiday season.
Ways to Support Youth this Holiday Season
The holiday season for many, may bring both immense stress and joy. Gatherings can highlight family tensions, disrupt sleep and routines, and normal sources of support aren’t as readily available; this may amplify the mental health struggles youth are already experiencing.
So what’s a caring adult to do? Here are some ideas, based on the Search Institute’s framework for positive developmental relationships:
1. Be warm and intentional: Don’t forget to individually greet kids at your next holiday get-together. Make sure they know they are welcome and that you’re happy to see them, not just their accompanying adults.
2. Include me: Include kids and teens as you’re building your holiday schedule. What gatherings, activities, or traditions mean the most to them? What are their priorities for the season? Give them a say in the decisions that affect them.
3. Respect me: If you’re getting resistance to a particular holiday tradition or gathering, stop and ask why. Listen to understand. Even if you ultimately ask for their participation, try to clearly understand their concerns first and come to a fair solution.
4. Encourage: Specific compliments go a long way. Look for opportunities to recognize a young person’s unique point of view, persistence, or character.
5. Let me lead: Consider asking the kids and teens in your family if they’d like to lead a holiday activity traditionally headed up by an adult. What would change if the kids took over? Or how can you create a new holiday tradition with the young people in your life?
6. Set boundaries: If it’s within your control, set limits on the seasonal schedule. Help young people prioritize their favorite activities instead of getting overwhelmed. And keep rest at the top of the to-do list!
Child development experts emphasize the importance of setting realistic expectations for the holidays, sticking to a normal schedule as much as possible, getting time outside, and practicing gratitude together. Simplifying gift-giving, practicing social skills before get-togethers, and giving teens space to be moody are also solid strategies.
And perhaps most of all: Find ways to care for your own needs so you can find beauty and keep showing up for the young people in your life!
Navigating Holiday Stress for Parents
For many parents, it can quickly become overwhelming. The pressure to make everything perfect, manage endless tasks, and juggle family dynamics can take a toll on mental health. Prioritizing self-care, setting healthy boundaries, and tapping into your support system can help you navigate the season with more balance and less stress. Here are five learnings to help you do this from MHA and ASU's webinar, "I don't know how to care for myself in stressful times."
1. Identify your values and priorities and set boundaries accordingly.
It can be easy to fall into the mindset that we must do everything during the holidays, and quickly, you are saying yes too much. Have a clear vision, set your boundaries and stick to them. That could mean spending more time together as a family instead of overcommitting to outside activities or saying yes to a half-day event instead of a full day.
2. Reframe the way you think of self-care.
Shift the way you think of self-care from self-indulgence to self-preservation. Often, parents feel as though they must prioritize themselves last to ensure everyone else is taken care of. When we reframe the way we think about self-care, we can identify how it is a necessity to maintain our physical and mental health.
Some examples of self-care practices include:
Finding a moment to take some deep breaths and re-regulate your nervous system
Asking your support system for help: can someone watch the kids while I go out and shop?
Finding time for movement that feels good for your body - even if it's 5-10 minutes of stretching or walking
Saying no to a holiday event if you need the time and space
3. Welcome - and ask for help from your support system.
Instead of parenting by yourself, parent with your village. You are not alone, and it's okay to ask for help. Likely, others in your life are feeling the same overwhelm. Consider reaching out to friends, neighbors, or community members to co-care for each other.
The holidays may also bring up feelings of grief and sadness, especially if some of your loved ones are no longer with you to celebrate. Having a support system can help provide comfort during challenging times of grief.
4. Find ways to embed joy in your routines.
When you have so much on your plate, the little things like washing dishes or doing laundry can seem exhausting. For example, for activities in your weekly routine, try to create moments of joy with your children. Invite your children to help dry while you wash or fold laundry together. Put on some fun music and try to make a moment where you bring joy into the mundane.
5. Leave comparison at the door.
It's easy to compare yourself to others, especially with social media, only showing what seems to be the best parts of everyone's lives. During the holidays, this can be heightened by the stress of buying gifts, participating in all the activities, and traveling to see family. These things can add additional emotional stress and financial strain on families.
By focusing on what truly matters, setting boundaries, prioritizing self-care, leaning on your support system, and embracing the simple joys, you can create a season that's meaningful and enjoyable for you and your family. Remind yourself that it's not about perfection but about being present and intentional with the time and resources you have. Take a deep breath, let go of comparison, and give yourself grace this holiday season.
Set a Spiritual Focus on the True Meaning of Christmas
Here are some ways parents can maintain a spiritual focus on the true meaning of Christmas:
Read the Christmas story together: Read the Bible passages about the birth of Jesus (Luke 2:1-20 and Matthew 1:18-25). Discuss the significance of the story and how it relates to your family.
Attend church services: Participate in Christmas Eve or Christmas Day services. Many churches offer special services for families with young children.
Decorate with religious symbols: Incorporate religious symbols like nativity scenes and crosses into your Christmas decorations.
Sing Christmas carols: Sing traditional Christmas carols that focus on the birth of Christ, such as “Silent Night” and “O Holy Night.”
Volunteer as a family: Volunteer at a local charity or food bank to help those in need. This can teach children the importance of giving back to others.
Pray together as a family: Pray for others, for guidance, and for a deeper understanding of the true meaning of Christmas.
Create a family Advent calendar: Use an Advent calendar to count down the days until Christmas. Each day, read a Bible verse or Christmas story together.
Practice gratitude: Take time to reflect on the blessings in your life, especially the gift of Jesus Christ.
Set aside time for quiet reflection: Take some time each day to reflect on Christmas’s meaning and connect with God.
Watch Christmas movies with a spiritual message: Choose movies that focus on the true meaning of Christmas, such as…
A Charlie Brown Christmas: This classic animated special reminds us of the true meaning of Christmas through the eyes of Charlie Brown and his friends. It’s a simple yet powerful message about the importance of love and peace.
The Nativity Story: This movie depicts the biblical story of the birth of Jesus Christ. It’s a powerful and moving film that highlights the true meaning of Christmas.
The Star: This animated film tells the story of the first Christmas from the perspective of animals. It’s a fun and heartwarming story that emphasizes the importance of hope and faith.
The Ultimate Gift: This film tells the story of a wealthy young man who learns the true meaning of Christmas through a series of challenges and lessons. It’s a heartwarming story about family, love, and giving back.
These movies offer a great opportunity to spend quality time with your family and reflect on the true meaning of Christmas.
Incorporating these practices into your family’s Christmas traditions can help your children develop a deeper understanding of the holiday’s true meaning.
Inspiration from the Holy Scriptures
Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judea, to the city of David, which is called Bethlehem, because he was of the house and lineage of David, to be registered with Mary, his betrothed wife, who was with child. So it was that while they were there, the days were completed for her to be delivered. And she brought forth her firstborn Son and wrapped Him in swaddling cloths, and laid Him in a manger because there was no room for them in the inn. – Luke 2:4-7 NKJV
Reading with your children consistently pays many dividends, including nurturing their language, cognitive, and emotional development. Reading the Bible with them furthers their spiritual growth. Christmastime offers a perfect opportunity to focus on the real reason for the season with them by reading the story of the Savior’s birth together.
Help your child achieve a heart-level understanding and a deep appreciation for what God the Father did for them when He gave the greatest Gift of all, His only Son, for their salvation. That’s what Christmas is all about.
Resources
https://searchinstitute.org/developmental-relationships
https://www.mhanational.org/blog/11-ways-support-youth-holiday-season
https://urbanlight.org/navigating-holiday-stress/
Mabel Martinez-Almonte, OTR/L, MA, MHC, NCC
If you or someone you know is in a crisis, get help immediately. You can text the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
DISCLAIMER: The content on this blog is generated for entertainment or/and informative purposes, but not intended to be a substitute for professional medical or behavioral health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or a qualified mental health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical or mental health condition.